#2301: | Language Police: "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" are sexist and discriminatory. Use "personfriend". Thank you for your cooperation. |
#2302: | Freedom is the ability to change course in response to unexpected circumstances. Imprisonment is being locked into one course regardless. |
#2303: | "Freedom is the right to live as we wish." - Epictetus - WRONG! No one has the right to live as they wish. Wishes must be negotiated! |
#2304: | Ones experience as a camper is inversely proportional to the amount of campinq equipment one thinks one needs. |
#2305: | Success is no refuge for the driven. |
#2306: | For every fresh young talent coming on the scene, there must be an old, washed up talent falling off it. |
#2307: | The Olympic Games are a traditional competition in which countries vie with each other to take on crushing debt for a few weeks of vanity. |
#2308: | Fewer people would lose their money in the stock market if we used a more accurate name than "investing". How about "bubble riding"? |
#2309: | Most states have Amber Alerts for missing children but Florida also has Gray Alerts for, um... I forget... Where am I? Whose tweet is this? |
#2310: | New photo album: "University of Tampa" http://bit.ly/bqVK2X - Moorish, not borish! |
#2311: | Men are judged great by history based not on their accomplishments but on their ability to produce memorable Twitter-sized quotes. |
#2312: | One person's eroticism is another's tedium. |
#2313: | There's no accounting for sexual attraction. Logic need not apply. |
#2314: | Current reality is irrelevant to the brain as long as it is pursuing a compelling vision. |
#2315: | My current subsistence business (and travel addiction satiator): http://glennsdrivingservice.com |
#2316: | Sex is like chocolate cake: tasty at times but bland if you have it every day and certainly not worth rearranging your life for. |
#2317: | No censorship is so draconian as that imposed by the individual upon himself to defend his current investments. |
#2318: | Your own personal freedom is the core tool through which all other things are accomplished. |
#2319: | Enough negatively, people! Let's have more positive, life-affirming tweets without all the criticism and passing of judgments. And sarcasm. |
#2320: | The nature of the court system is to be obtuse and inaccessible. Help is available for those with money but not for those who need it most. |
#2321: | work - n. a compromise made with the outside world to permit you to keep doing at least some of what you want to do. |
#2322: | Forest Shut Down By County Health Dept. - Cites Unhealthy Practices: Bears Shitting In Woods, Animals Eating Uncooked Meat, Rotting Refuse |
#2323: | I'm turning the fashion world on its head with my audacious designs and impeccable Je Ne Sais Quoi! Paris, Milan, New York... I'm the rave! |
#2324: | Give a man a fish, and he'll eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he'll deplete the local fisheries. |
#2325: | "Its better to get angry than to get hopeless!" @gauravkantgoel - But neither is as good as taking control. Anger is merely frustration. |
#2326: | Heard on CNN: "U.S. soldiers are under orders to avoid civilian casualties if at all possible." - They need orders for that? |
#2327: | Marriage involves the acceptance of creeping change, usually leading to conditions you never would have agreed to in the beginning. |
#2328: | On my bucket list: Get really fat and use an electric scooter, park in handicap spaces and demand special attention for my "disability". |
#2329: | No porno mag can match the exploitation, superficiality and naked voyeurism of any issue of People Magazine. |
#2330: | Morality, at its base, is a problem of statistics. Which action, taken today, will lead to the best probable outcome for the world? |
#2331: | There are no morally pure positions, only compromises between imperfect real-world alternatives. |
#2332: | Tested positive for steroid use. Also, used the "N" word in a Playboy interview. I apologize deeply. I know I've let everyone down. |
#2333: | What makes an Olympic athlete: a driven parent, a lost childhood, an addiction to repetitive exercise, a gambler's delusion of winning big. |
#2334: | Some of the greatest discoveries are made while pursuing delusions. Our search for El Dorado at least gets us moving! |
#2335: | It seems presumptuous to say "God Bless America" or "God Save the Queen". Shouldn't He already know what to do without your advice? |
#2336: | Wanna hang here, can't be no square. Gotta be hip. Gotta be groovy. Gotta be plugged into what's happen'n, man! Dig it? |
#2337: | What if you suddenly lost your sex drive - forever? Would it be a curse or a blessing? What would change? What wouldn't? Who would you be? |
#2338: | Hunter S Thompson and Ernest Hemingway both died from "a single self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head." Is there anyone who died of two? |
#2339: | We get along with our adult families only because we know, from experience, what not to talk about to keep the peace. |
#2340: | If someone is drug or alcohol addicted, and they are still financially solvent, then there must be an enabler propping them up. |
#2341: | Every family is a sordid little gothic novel, with a lot more going on below the surface than can ever be talked about openly. |
#2342: | Most people can't handle freedom. Without the enforced structure of debts, obligations and a job, they would self-destruct. |
#2343: | Student protests are about as effective in changing the world as goldfish going on hunger strike inside their fishbowl. |
#2344: | Ah, Valentines Day, the most ominous holiday. You're walking a tightrope, dude, and there will be hell to pay if you get it wrong. |
#2345: | The ultimate test of any philosophy is the consequences it leads to in the real world. |
#2346: | How responsible is the consumer for suffering and exploitation along the supply chain? Mainly, he is protected by just not knowing about it. |
#2347: | Consumers assume that something sealed in a pretty plastic package is somehow pure, but some god-awful things can come in those packages. |
#2348: | "You can't judge a book by its cover," but consumers universally do. Marketing, presentation and fostered delusion are everything. |
#2349: | Seagulls are the new pigeons, living off of man in any environment, often far from the sea. Gotta admire their adaptibility. |
#2350: | "Freedom means the opportunity to be what we never thought we would be." - Daniel J. Boorstin via @davidvgoliath |
#2351: | Free will dies the moment you say "forever". From that point on, love is a contract, not a choice. |
#2352: | Of all the services of modern technology, only two seem non-negotiable: internet access and medical care. |
#2353: | If you think you can live without medical care (ie insurance), consider that the "natural" historic lifespan of humans was barely 40 years. |
#2354: | I only have a problem with temptation that's right in front of me. A bag of chips in the car with me will be eaten, but not if I toss them. |
#2355: | Using cows to make milk can't be called worse than using cheap Chinese labor to make American consumer products. |
#2356: | There is no absolute good and evil. There is only relative good and evil compared to the alternatives actually available. |
#2357: | There ought to be a formula for evaluating human and animal suffering. Human should be rated higher, and slow torture more than quick death. |
#2358: | If crimes were sentenced according to actual suffering caused, murder might receive a light sentence compared to other crimes. |
#2359: | A natural corollary of freedom is loneliness. |
#2360: | The only sure way to change someone's behavior is to let them experience the direct consequences of it. Alas, they may die in the process. |
#2361: | An existential genius: @TheBosha - Author of many a tweet I wish I wrote myself. |
#2362: | Just because a little of something is good doesn't mean a lot of it will be even better. Once you meet your needs, more is usually less. |
#2363: | When people say on their wedding day, "I'll never be lonely again," they don't get it: You can be married and still be lonely. |
#2364: | If porn is just the same acts repeated over and over, why do we need new porn? Can't we just recycle the old porn and save the environment? |
#2365: | Most violence is born of paranoia. In some distorted way, the perpetrator believes he is under threat and is merely defending himself. |
#2366: | We all grew up in a protected environment, an artificial one, and the great trauma of life is discovering that the world works differently. |
#2367: | The absence of lies should not be confused with honesty. |
#2368: | Religion, like other addictions, is the enemy of self-responsibility. |
#2369: | The highest standard of honor is to be consistent with yourself. |
#2370: | Stupid people aren't just boring but dangerous, because when under pressure they don't have the mental discipline to avoid paranoia. |
#2371: | When someone is paranoid, they are inherently dangerous, because they can easily turn against you in "self defense". |
#2372: | All my tweets on paranoia: http://bit.ly/cqej4O |
#2373: | Kilroy's Rules of Twitter Style: http://bit.ly/bRtf6g - My 14 rules for a better Twitter feed. |
#2374: | When entering a public restroom, ones immediate comfort is dictated by the presence or absence of urinals. |
#2375: | Many a prison was built on the rock of love. |
#2376: | Society is built on a delicate web of withheld information. Speaking the truth in the wrong circumstances can be as destructive as any lie. |
#2377: | Between truth and lie is discretion. |
#2378: | Porn star claims Tiger Woods got her pregnant - twice. Shouldn't someone teach those innocent porn stars about contraception? |
#2379: | Kilroy Cafe #63: "Truth, Lies & Discretion" http://bit.ly/9Y42pP - Honesty isn't always the best policy. Inspired by @FussySaffa |
#2380: | Even the most exotic experience seems normal when you are going through it. Your mind adjusts and can't see it the way history will. |
#2381: | There is no sin in having money in the bank, only in wasting it on the frivolous. |
#2382: | Everything you own but don't need not only clutters up your own life but isolates you from the bulk of humanity who is struggling to get by. |
#2383: | Your first marriage expresses your idealism to others. Your second is grounded in reality and is just for you. |
#2384: | The fundamental conflict of romance is when the heart says yes but the brain says no. Who do you believe? |
#2385: | Romantic bonding is when you start looking around for your partner like a toddler for his mommy. Stay away too long and you start to cry. |
#2386: | What we call "falling in love" is the brain rearranging itself to bond with a new parent. Soon you're following them around like a duckling. |
#2387: | Romance turns violent when the relationship is failing but the physiological bond is still there. It's a desperate attempt to regain love. |
#2388: | Oxymoron alert: "Christian existentialism" (The core idea of existentialism is that you don't need a God to tell you what to do.) |
#2389: | Tooloosahoochee, Florida. Not a real town, but it should be. |
#2390: | @aubynr Nobody shaves a cat. You can skin it though. There's more than one way. |
#2391: | What part of "You're going to die" don't you get? |
#2392: | I have replaced my web address on Twitter with a new "Greetings, Twitterers!" page: http://www.kilroycafe.com/twitter/home - Good idea! |
#2393: | Trapped in plane on the tarmac, 2 hours and counting, poor internet, power getting low. This could be my last transmissi |
#2394: | Among us lives a special race of humans who look like us and sound like us but inside they are not like us BECAUSE THEY'RE FRICKING IDIOTS! |
#2395: | (Trapped on a grounded plane for over 2.5 hours beside members of that special race who are not taking it well.) |
#2396: | The same wounded ego that propels you to the top will probably push you off the other side. |
#2397: | Headline from @latimes: "Survivor: Alabama professor shot methodically" - I saw: "Survivor: Alabama". Next: "Survivor: Bedford-Stuyvesant"? |
#2398: | Spooky how most couples you see in public look like each other. Some are different but most could be brother and sister. |
#2399: | In Florida, live-tweeting alligator biting off my arm. Guess what guys?! I have a new tweeting hand! (Thank God it didn't get my B'berry!) |
#2400: | Government is built on the crackpot theories of people who have never had to run a government. |